Pink Top, No Plans

Sunday night on Samui and I have absolutely no plans. That used to bother me when I was younger. Now it is my favourite kind of evening. Just me, my room, my music, and whatever mood I feel like being in.

I put on my pink top because it makes me feel awake. Something about bright colours at night. I did my eyes, put on my earrings, and took a few photos. Not for anyone in particular. Just because I felt like it. At 45 you stop needing a reason to look good.

I have lived on this island for a long time now. Long enough to remember when it was quieter, before all the tourists discovered it. I do not mind the tourists. They bring energy. But the Samui I love is the one that comes out after they go to sleep. The late night noodle shops. The dogs on the road. The warm air that never really cools down.

People sometimes ask me if I get lonely living here. I do not think they understand what it means to finally be comfortable with yourself. I spent years figuring out who I was. Now that I know, being alone with her is not lonely at all. It is peaceful.

Tomorrow I will probably do the same thing. Maybe I will go to the beach. Maybe I will not. That is the beauty of having no plans. Everything is possible and nothing is urgent.